“Force, no matter how concealed, begets resistance.” ~ Lakota Proverb
Your ability to lead others is directly tied to your ability to influence them.
One of the tools you can use to more powerfully influence others is the use of story in your interactions. Stories can magnify a point or grab an audiences attention during a presentation. They can be seamlessly woven into a conversation so that others experience what is being said, instead of just hearing the words.
Unfortunately, stories can also used in an incredibly negative way. When someone shares a story but leaves out key facts or information to shade the truth or shape the others perspectives this is just an indirect way to attempt to control others. This happens 24/7 in the media, and sadly it happens with some leaders as well.
Some leaders do not take such a subtle approach and instead try to control forcefully with words or actions in the form of bullying, threatening or some type of retribution. These leaders believe that by applying force they will get their needs met. However, when you apply force to anything, especially people, you get push back…it is unavoidable.
Why? Because Newton’s 3rd Law of Motion describes exactly what happens when a leader applies force to their team. It states that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.
In other words, the more control you exert, the greater the push-back will be in return, whether it is displayed outwardly and immediately or inwardly and eventually.
3 Things That Happen When Leaders Apply Force
When a leader applies force these are the three things that can happen as a results:
- Out-right defiance or disagreement (aggressive) – People visibly push back and refuse to buy-in. This creates silos and an antagonistic or fearful environment.
- Sabotage or false agreement (passive-aggressive) – Employees give the appearance they agree but they do not. It may show up as missed deadlines, mistakes, forgetfulness, or absenteeism.
- Hidden disengagement (passive) – Folks just disengage mentally and emotionally. Complacency, low morale, and low productivity are just a few of the many outward signs of this form of push-back.
Influencing Others To Be Their Best
When you choose to be a leader, you commit to influencing others to do or to be their best! It means that you take 100% accountability and ownership to speak the truth, and more importantly…how your words and stories impact your people.
It means you lead from a place of power which is all about influence and authority. Authority as defined by: au·thor·i·ty / əˈTHôrədē/ – from the word Author c. 1300. auctor – enlarger, founder, leader, one who causes to grow!
Just because you have a direct style doesn’t mean you can bludgeon others with your words or use them like a weapon to get what you want! When you do that, you are just being an egotistical ass.
Everyday you have the opportunity to influence others in a positive or negative way…it is a choice..it is my wish that you would choose wisely!
Want to learn how to be a more powerful leader click here.
Till next time…
